Happy birthday to this amazing young man! From the moment I met him when he was 8, when he became my second son, I knew I’d love him. And now 12 years later, he’s still the kind and happy person with the big smile I first sighted. He’s grown up to be thoughtful, well-read and brilliant, mA, with far-ranging interests. (Like I pick his brain unabashedly sometimes while I’m writing and don’t know the ins and outs of science-y stuff!) I’m so proud of all that he’s accomplished thus far both at school and at home, where he’s been with us in Toronto for the last couple of years. Recently, he learned to make his dad’s favorite green soup (chock full of roasted greens) and presented it to him when his dad was sick (last pic is the gratitude hug I was privileged to capture). I’m grateful to his mom, @simply_kimm_ , for instilling such a positive outlook, a loving heart and gentle manners in J! Thank you mom — I’m so happy to co-mother this awesome son with you! ♥️♥️♥️
P.s. for an awesome photographer, check J’s mom’s photography out: @blakeydawnphotos 💖
♥️Detours♥️
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On Dec. 29, 2007, on the way downtown to take our kids skating, my brother asked if it was ok if we dropped by the convention centre so he could say salaam to some friends who’d come to town for an event. My sister & I were reluctant (skating! at city hall! under night lights!) but then, he convinced us by parking so we all bundled into the place. A few minutes later, my world changed.
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After my divorce, my entire focus had been my 2 young children, at the centre of my world. Coming upon 4 years on my own, I couldn’t imagine the idea of meeting a new life partner. On top of trying to be an A+ single parent, I was also committed to a full-time career. There was simply no time for love. I also knew myself pretty well; that I couldn’t survive the make-small-talk-with-strangers-while-keeping-the-single-goal-of-getting-married that was the Muslim Meet scene because I’m SUPER awkward at stranger chit-chat. As for the burgeoning online scene: from friends’ experiences, I gleaned it was also fraught with perils for someone with social anxiety. (And I’d grown up unfamiliar with the arranged marriage experience so that was a terrain I was, frankly, not open to.)
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So. There I was, contently committed to living my best life as a super-mommy — when we took a detour into the convention centre & a friend walked up to my sis & I and asked us if we knew anyone who was looking to meet someone. Because she knew of a person who was looking! She proceeded to describe him & while I was racking my brain thinking of who from my friends I could match with this person, my sister said yes, I know someone & it’s her & she pointed at me. And like a cliche, I looked around to see if she was pointing elsewhere & then pointed at myself & said ME? YOU TALKING ABOUT ME? before shaking my head furiously with UM NO I’M NOT MEETING ANYONE.
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Then I met him the next day, because my sis is Zayneb, unrelenting & driven, and then we met again the day after (which is today, 12 years ago!). And then again. Then 7 months later we got our nikah done & so I say SEIZE THE DETOURS IN LIFE BECAUSE SOMETIMES THEY LEAD TO A MOST BLESSED ROAD EVEN IF YOU MISS SKATING TIME. ⛸ #alhamdulillah ♥️
